Chappelle Phone Pouch Chaos!

0:01 Calaroga Media. Hello, I'm Johnny Mac with your daily comedy news. Now, if we were in the basement together, you would be like, hey, John, you're wearing an L.A. hat. Does that suggest that you were in Los Angeles all weekend and pre-taped this episode last Wednesday? As we all know, it was a slow news week and you're just going to try and fake that this is like a super timely episode. Is that what's going on here, John? To which I would say, no, of course not. Why would you accuse me of such a thing? Here, I've got a story about somebody online at Dave Chappelle's concert. Man, there was a line from MySanAntonio.com, the headline, I got fed up. Dave Chappelle fans delayed entry at show in Austin. One fan decided to leave without seeing Chappelle. Apparently, Jeff is from Austin. And he shared a video on Instagram of his experience waiting in line for 45 minutes to an hour outside the venue last Monday. Jeff from Austin said fans had a wait line that, quote, wrapped around the building to receive a paper for a lock pouch to secure their phones. See, this is why you don't leave the house, because they make you lock your phones. Like, it's really annoying. Like, I've seen Dave Chappelle before. I have no interest in going anywhere and locking my phone. I'm not doing it.

1:18 Jeff decided to leave without seeing Chappelle because he believed the process was taking too long. In his video, Jeff from Austin said, people are still waiting. Nothing is happening. I got fed up. I'm going home. It sucks because this was my first time going to see Dave Chappelle and I'm not going to get to go see him. He ended his video calling out the Moody Center as he described the experience as an abysmal way of handling an event. Moody Center, y'all got to do better. That's an effing mess, bro. It is unclear if Chappelle's show had already started by the time Jeff from Austin left the line. The venue had encouraged people to leave their phones in their cars because, quote, anyone who brings a cell phone will be required to place in a locked pouch. However, another person wrote, I love the Ticketmaster email I got yesterday.

2:02 It says leave my phone in my car because it's a no-phone show, but it also says my phone is my ticket. Yeah, that's really annoying. Can we go back to tickets? Whatever happened to tickets? Or can I print something out at least? I don't want to use my phone as a ticket because you make me lock my phone in my car. Another show attendee said, said it was bad. We waited and got in just as he was going. Other attendees said that they waited in line for five to 20 minutes before getting in. Now, if this were a pre-tape coming off a slow news week, which it is absolutely not, stop accusing me of that. And you're like, boy, I really need one more story. Who's always up to something? You know, who's always up to something? Kevin Hart. And you Googled Kevin Hart and you found a story like this. I mean, that is not what's happening here. Shark Beauty. has partnered with Kevin Hart to launch a limited edition cryo-glow LED mask co-designed by Kevin Hart. Sure it was. Hart, a global brand ambassador for Shark Beauty owner Shark Ninja, and known for roles in the Jumanji franchise and the movie Fatherhood. That's how we're credentialing Kevin Hart? He's known for the movie Fatherhood?

3:05 What is Fatherhood? Oh yeah, who can forget this one? Fatherhood is a 2021 American comedy drama film starring Kevin Hart as Matt, a new father who has to raise his daughter alone after his wife dies unexpectedly the day after giving birth. PG-13, hour 49 minutes. Yeah, I mean, if you ask me what Kevin Hart is known for, I would absolutely say Fatherhood and also the Jumanji movies. Kevin Hart, the global brand ambassador for Shark Beauty, owner of Shark Ninja, worked with the team to co-create the new colorway for the Pure Beauty Award-winning LED treatment. This comes in a gunmetal and red finish, and the launch is set to take Kevin Hart's interests, hobbies, and lifestyle in mind, referencing high-performance cars and fitness culture to create a bold, unexpected take On at-home skincare. I kind of enjoy the slow news day when I have to make something out of nothing. I mean, this is great. Oh, boy.

3:59 Laura is a senior VP. She said with the launch of this new limited edition color, we wanted to make men's self-care feel easy, approachable and simple enough to effortlessly fit into our consumers existing routines. Kevin Hart was the perfect partner to bring this to life, bringing his natural lightheartedness, humor and relatability to introduce Shark Beauty's cryo glow technology to his audience. Kevin Hart gave a statement. He said, Between being on set, maintaining my workout routine, running my businesses, and keeping up with my family, I'm always on the move, so I need my self-care to work around my schedule. Cryo Glow makes it easy to take a few minutes for myself without slowing down. And I love the bold, edgy design we created together. If I'm going to wear an LED mask, might as well look this good. How much time do you think Kevin Hart spent on this?

4:43 You think maybe he was on a conference call? Maybe? Or was this just an email where he wrote like, I don't know, make it like red? How much time did Kevin spend on this? John Mulaney has canceled his show in Bangor for the second time. That headline is a little loaded. The first time was in 2023. There was a horrible local incident, and I don't want to make light of it. I'll tell you what it is. You can Google it. But like there was good reason that first show was canceled this time. I think there's good reason to nowhere near as serious as the incident. I dare not name. But Mulaney was supposed to play on Thursday, November 5th. My guess is he's getting ready to host Saturday Night Live in. I got to do math here in like 13 days. So that would be my guess why he postponed the show. But you'd have to ask John Mulaney. Deadline asked Dane Cook, what do you make of this moment in comedy where untold numbers of comics are exploding on social media? You were one of the first standups to reach that level, etc, etc.

5:37 Dane Cook said, yeah, I know a lot of the comics you're talking about. Some of them I've known since they were kids. I knew Nikki Glaser when she stepped on the stage. I was texting her last night about Madison Square Garden. That's a little flex by Dane there. Matt Rife wrote me a letter when he was 14 years old, and then not only did he open for me many, many years, he saw me at Nationwide Arena, and then I was his surprise guest and introduced him. Where he saw me at 15, I got to bring him on stage and watch his incredible show. Deadline asked about the gatekeepers. Dane said, I used to say we're too busy going up against each other. We need to work together more to help each other develop and write for each other and put each other on blast in the most positive way. So to see that and see the podcasting and the self-actualizing and the ability to have a unique voice and not have to be a chameleon for some gatekeeper's version of you, like you have to change this and this, you can find success by being the absolute best version of the creative powerhouse that you are.

6:28 Once you work up to that point, you can have anything you want. You don't need to wait for anybody to tell you that anymore. So that's very, very cool to see. Maria Bamford spoke to the Radio Atlantic and she said, so I want to accept the industry as it is, which is unpredictable and sometimes punishing and say, well, I'm going to get paid for whatever this is and not have any expectations of it. Because I think that's, for me, where bitterness comes in, where I go, oh, they said it was going to become something and it isn't. And I spent, you know, seven years on it. So, yeah, it's sort of more a personal, emotional responsibility for myself. I would really appreciate my own time. And you never know when things are going to fall apart. Los Angeles is, people say it's flaky, I think it's geographics. It's that you see someone and you go, wow, you're a brilliant star, and you're going to be everything and anything, but then you go drive home 50 minutes and you kind of forget about it, about what you said and what you promised at a meeting at Netflix with water bottles. Radar Online says Greg Gutfeld's ratings are in a tailspin. Oh no!

7:19 They say the Gutfeld host, who's Gutfeld, has seen his audience evaporate with the latest numbers, revealing his show is down 13% in total viewers. and a whopping 23% in the 18-49s compared to last year. A network insider told Radar Online the Fox guys live and die by their numbers, so you can bet this thing is getting a whole lot of attention. Greg has spent years walking around like he's the golden boy of the network, and that attitude has rubbed plenty of people the wrong way. So there are a lot of people who are enjoying seeing him knock down a peg or two. Radar Online wrote, The insider claims Gutfeld's Easter Island-sized head. An allegedly abrasive treatment of staffers and fellow hosts have left him with precious few friends at the network. An insider said his enemies are jumping at the chance to kick him while he's down and telling the bosses his numbers don't warrant the wide berth he's been getting for bad behavior. A Fox News rep, however, said Gutfeld remains the number one late night talk show of the year with over 2.7 million viewers, the only late night talk show to surpass 2.5 million viewers, which would be true if the show were actually on late night. Gutfeld airs at 10 p.m. Eastern. That's night.

8:22 That's prime time. That's not a late night show. That's a prime time show. Prime time goes to 11 p.m. If the show started at 11, I might meet you halfway and go, OK, yeah, sure. You know, that's fine. But it's at 10, which is 7 West. There is even if you want to fight me on the 10 East, 7 West, you know, say you're in L.A. and you're in a hotel room. You're like, there's nothing to do. I guess I'll watch Gutfeld. I mean, that would never, ever happen in L.A., but Not for me, anyway. But say you did. It would only be 7 o'clock in the evening. I like to go to bed early, but there's nothing that makes 7 p.m. Pacific late-night television, so Fox News rep, I don't know what you're talking about. A source said, Gutfeld's not letting anyone see him sweat.

9:03 He's telling everyone it's just a minor blip and fully expects to bounce back. See, these shows where I have nothing can be fun sometimes. Don't forget, you're going to vote tomorrow. I guess you can still early vote today if you want to do that. But do what I'm going to do. Get up early. Get a nice coffee and go vote. There's usually not lines at 6 in the morning. Just do it. But it's super important that you vote this time around. Again, I'm not here to tell you who to vote for. You might like these people. You might like some other people. You might like a third set. You might want to mix and match. Do you. But it's super important you vote, especially at the local level. That's where a lot of stuff can get a little wonky. Here in town, everybody's fighting over whether or not there should be a McDonald's. I'm on the very controversial pro-McDonald's side.

9:46 Here's why. Anytime I go to Europe, I want a big drink and I want a cold drink. And either one of those is almost impossible to find in Europe, except by my friends at McDonald's, who will sell me a pretty big Diet Coke with ice. And that makes me happy. Plus, if you've ever been in Europe and you need to use the toilet, good luck finding one. You know who has one and will let you use it? Your friends at McDonald's. So I know the people in town get mad at me and they're like, you want a McDonald's in town? I do. I do. And sometimes on a Monday night, today's Monday, and I teach Coming home, I'm like, boy, if I could just get a little something. But there's nothing on the drive home. So I'm pro-McDonald's. Also, they've been renovating the National Donuts chain. So I am two weeks into not being able to get an iced coffee in the morning. And my wife is making fun of me because I'm such a baby about it. But I'm getting the caffeine headaches. And I don't want to drive three miles to the green place that Kenny likes.

10:37 it's too far. If it was in town, I'd go. If there were a McDonald's, I'd get an iced coffee at McDonald's. I'm not like that attached to the national donut chain, but I need my iced coffee in the morning. I digress. So I'm going to get an iced coffee somewhere and go vote tomorrow. It's super important you vote. The late night guys were talking about voting. Now, these are the real late night guys, not the Gutfeld people on at 7 Pacific. These are the guys on 1135 or later. They were talking about the midterm elections, which, of course, you're going to vote in tomorrow. Jimmy Kimmel said, you know, The midterm elections will decide whether Republicans retain control of Congress or whether it was stolen by a caravan of woke dog-eating transgender immigrants. Seth Meyers, make 1230 great again, joked hard to believe. Only two more weeks until there's two more years until there's 90 days until the next insurrection. Wow. Jimmy Fallon said, well, guys, midterm elections. Yep, it's the final sprint to Election Day, and President Trump was traveling all across the country trying to compliment as many people's butts as he possibly can. That appears to be true. You can send your letters to Jimmy Fallon if you're upset. The L.A. Times asked Alfred Robles, hey, Alfred Robles, what's the first thing you blew a bunch of money on? And Alfred Robles said, a 63 Impala, bro.

11:42 That's one of my cars I always wanted since I was a kid. He added, I'm happy my mom's older and she can't drive, so I don't have to buy her anything. Then the L.A. Times asked Alfred Robles, hey, Alfred, in your special, you mentioned issues that befall a man of a certain age, like going to get a prostate exam. Robles said, dude, that was my first physical ever two years ago. And that was one of the roughest things I ever got through, bro, was a prostate exam. I wasn't even prepared for that because I didn't know what was going to happen. Men, men, men, men, men. Let's get serious here. I already let you devote. Get physicals. We have medicine now. Don't get sick. Just go to the doctor. Let the doctor help you. And the prostate exam. Look, do I wake up in the morning and go, boy, I wish I had a prostate exam? I don't. Is it the most pleasant thing ever? No, but it is by no means horrible. It really isn't. Just go to the doctor, okay? Vulture does their comedians that you should know and will know or whatever it's called. One of them is Serenity Wirasekera, the Sri Lankan-born, San Diego-raised, 28-year-old UC Berkeley dropout. Her material centers on the child of immigrants experience, and it's in those jokes, based in memories of a vulnerable and complex dynamic in her upbringing, where she lands on emotional truths like making a crack about how, quote, all immigrant kids are paralegals. She jokes about all the usual suspects. Sex, dating, being a barista, but her naughty streak leads to fresh takes on the old standards. What is the most earnest goal she has? It is to be the best stand-up comedian, actor, and writer I can be while maintaining freedom, autonomy, and balance. See, now there are some comedians who'd be like, comedian, actor, and writer, pick one. Like the brick wall guys would be like,

13:13 do you want to be a comedian or not? But it sounds like she's one of these modern folks who's like being a comedian to get a sitcom or something. That's what I'm reading into there. No shade. It's just what I'm reading. At this point in your comedy career, is there someone you've proved wrong? Perhaps Johnny Mac? Well, no, she says. The racist, sexist, and homophobic people on Facebook Reels will leave comments where they're like, this person, I really had to clean that up, a couple pejoratives in there, isn't funny, honey, don't quit your day job. And I'm like, I wish I had a day job to quit. I uploaded this clip with Wi-Fi I paid for with these jokes. And every time you comment and engage with my comedy, that's making my router connection stronger. I like that. Jimmy Carr's Am I the A-Hole returns to Comedy Central UK today.

13:57 Once again, Jimmy Carr will be joined by fellow comedian Jamali Maddox and influencer G.K. Berry. What is G.K. Berry known for? I'm just curious because, you know, some people are accusing this show of being a slow news day and Johnny Mac is just like trying to fill some time. But no, that's not true at all. G.K. Berry. Grace Eleanor Keeling, known professionally as GK Berry, is an English media personality, social media influencer and presenter. She began posting on video sharing platform TikTok while completing a film studies degree. OK, but what is she known for? Her Instagram description says she's built a career out of being hilariously authentic. OK, we have digressed enough. Anyway, she is on Am I the A-Hole? That program has achieved the best social performance for a Comedy Central UK original series in more than six years, with over 100 million video views and 1 million engagements. That is your comedy news for today. I will see you tomorrow with all the stuff that we just couldn't get to today. Today was a little busy.

14:53 You know, I had a lot of stuff to talk about. It's not like I pre-taped this a week ago. But tomorrow, we'll get to all that stuff that you guys have been talking about. See you then.