Sept. 14, 2025

Jim Gaffigan signs bourbon at Kroger, Nate Bargatze threatens Emmy fines, Fallon tapes in Detroit

Show Notes
Transcript

Jim Gaffigan meets fans at a Kroger bottle signing. Nate Bargatze promises to deduct $1,000 per second from Emmy winners who run long. Jimmy Fallon tapes a Detroit episode of The Tonight Show. Plus: Emmy predictions, Bowen Yang calls out AAPI snubs, Comedy Day in SF, a charity roast basketball game, and more Spinal Tap quotes

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Callarogas Shark media very busy Saturday, and I should start

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with the real news. But as I sat down a record,

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I heard from a friend of the show, Scott Beckett,

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live from American Airlines flight ten twenty one. He is

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telling me that the airline is in on the Bob's

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Burgers host. Now, if you're a new listener, I have

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two questions for you. One, have you ever seen Bob's Burgers?

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The answer is no, no one has. And two, and

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this is the real good part of the conspiracy. Have

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you ever met anyone who has seen Bob's Burgers? The

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answer is also no. I get that the artwork exists,

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and Scott has sent me American Airlines is posting the

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artwork for Bob's Burgers, but as we know, there's no

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such show. It's just something Kevin Burkhardt promotes on Sundays.

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Speaking of football, I had the Vikings Thursday night and

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mine was a sixteen point pick, So I'm putting him

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in the dust again. I'm in fifty sixth place, but

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I'm not letting him catch me. He also said he

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was listening to daily comedy news on the flight, as

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one does, and apparently my patent Oswalt Star Trek commentary

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made him chuckle, and his flight neighbor and his seat

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mate said, you seem to have liked that. Thank you, Scott.

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All Right, I diggress. Where should we start. Let's start

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with Late Night because I didn't do it yesterday. As

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you could tell, today is a much happier show than yesterday.

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Catching up from during the week. Did you see when

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the President went out for seafood the other night and

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the National Guards out in DC? Will Seth Meyers said,

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President Trump dined with several members of his cabinet at

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Joe Seafood while RFK just ate something they hit on

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the drive over. It's hilarious. Kimmel said, there are hundreds

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of troops on the state and somehow they led a

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thirty four time convicted fellon Walton to or a restaurant.

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No questions asked at all. Sharp commentary there, Jimmy Kimmel.

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Michael Costa said, Hey, nothing says I feel safe like

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driving one block from the White House surrounded by a

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fleet of armored cars and countless Secret Service agents. Kim

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Lill again, kim Old talked about that drawing that Jeffrey

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Epstein apparently had Kimmell said, I know how you get

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him meeting the president to admit that he did this.

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All you have to do is say that drawing is great,

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and he'll immediately take credit for it. Colbert said, And

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you know what they say, if it walks like a

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duck and it quacks like a duck, that duck shouldn't

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be allowed within three hundred yards of a school. Late,

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I was good this week, Fallon had commented on the

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White House renaming the Department of Defense the Department of War.

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Fallon said, when they heard about the big change, the

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owner of Cracker Bear was like, Eh, maybe take a

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minute and think about it. You know what I've been

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thinking about Jerry Seinfeld. The horrible Charlie Kirk story has

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given mister Seinfeld a lot of cover. I noticed on

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Friday the mainstream media was starting to notice the Seinfeld's comments.

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The weekend may help save mister Seinfeld, but I'm not

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sure that story is going away. College football today, Notre

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Dame takes on Texas A and M at seven point thirty.

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There are a few articles during the week about Shane

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Gillis's love of Notre Dame. It even made the New

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York Times, they write Notre Dame limits sideline passes for

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home football games to coach his family members. So Tommy

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Reese discovered a long lost cousin. That's how Shane Rees

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ended up on the sidelines. Coach Rees, who was the

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quarterback for the Irish from twenty ten to twenty thirteen, said,

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the students blew their cover they noticed that cousin Shane

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was a famous comedian. Coach Rees says, the students were

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going nuts. Our cover was blown. Now. Last weekend, Shane

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Gillis opened for Zach Bryan at Zach's Notre Dame concert.

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I saw Zach during the summer. Fantastic, and he sounds

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way better live than he does on the records, and

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he sounds really good on the records. Notre Dame coach

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Marcus Freeman said, you know, Shane's an awesome human, right,

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He's got a lot of notoriety just because of who

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he is and the way he really performs his craft.

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We appreciate him and the sport he gives our program

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makes us kind of cool. I guess. For the team

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season opener against Miami, Notre Dame listed Shane Gillis on

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the injury report as out because of tailgating. Last year,

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during the first round of the College Football Playoff, the

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jumbo screen showed Shane Gillis. Fans went nuts, the camera

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shifted off Shane, the crowd bowed. The New York Times

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rights back on Gillis, cheers, back off Gillis booze. Shane said,

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it makes me slightly uncomfortable because people were like, who

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the hell is this guy? But I think I represent

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a good note. Youre dame fan. I never went to

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school there. Of everything, I've been lucky enough to have

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happened to me, and this is probably easily the coolest that.

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It's definitely the coolest with my family. During the concert

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last weekend, Shane Gillis exited the stage. He high five

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fans and shouted f Michigan. Oh there's more, Brady Quinn said,

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every single night in Ireland we hung out. There were

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some stories. Gillis invited former quarterback Ian Book to a

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show in Sacramento. The night edited at three am at

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a blackjack table with Books, high school friends, Shane Gillis

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and UFC fighter Nate Diaz and his aunt Dearage. You know,

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I used to have nights like that when I worked

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at Sirius and I'm not just trying to be cool

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like that. We would go to Vegas. One of my

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high school friends, Matt, lives in Las Vegas, and we

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would go out and it'd be someone that was, you know,

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Shane Gillis level famous and their friends and you'd wind

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up at the blackjack table three am. I could relate

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to this, believe it or not, as lame as I

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am doing a podcast in the base. I wasn't always

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this old. Former Gord Chris Watt said, Shane's almost reserved

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down to earth. He could probably name all the Notre

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Dame quarterbacks I played with and actually did know them all.

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You never know these days how big fans some people are.

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He truly grew up living the team. What a great

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profile in the Times, right. This is good for everybody

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and so much more fun than yesterday's podcast. I'm just

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gonna point out. Meanwhile, Bert Kraser spoke about Bert's viral

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Florida State pregame speech. Who's Florida stak got today? We

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should know this? They're off today? Well that lever Ruin

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is my show? What are you doing? They play Kent

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State and on the twentieth. If you can wait, come on,

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Florida State schedule makers. I had this all lined up.

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I should have checked before anyway. Bert Kraser opened up

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about his viral Florida State pregame speech. Bert told Ridge

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Eyes and Florida State called me and said, would you

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give a pump up speech before the game? And I

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was like, yes, but you gotta give me the parameters.

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I literally scraped everything they wrote for me. I walked

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out with no script, and I gave what I would

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argue is my best. What did he say? Much funnier

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than I will read to you? Bert said, my name

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is Bert Kreischer. I spent six and a half years

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at this beautiful institution. I'm not even sure if I

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have a degree. I was baptized in nineteen ninety one

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in that end zone when there were still wooden bleachers,

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and when that spear went into the fifty yard line,

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tears streamed down my eyes. So those tears were gorn

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it in Gold Alabama thinks they're going to come in

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and roll all over us. They don't know where they are.

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I only have two words to say to you, go knowles.

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Bert said, ninety thousand people pop up. I'm crying, tears

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are coming down, my shirt comes off. Tom Sigor is crying.

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The athletic director was like, that was amazing. Coach Norville

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is pumping his arms. They go, do you want to

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see the spear drop? And I go yeah, and they

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take us. I'm shirtless to the fifty yard line. I

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look at Tommy, He's crying. I'm crying. It's the best

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day of our lives. That's what the Alabama game was

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for US. Florida State thirty one, University of Alabama seventeen.

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More sports dramatic actor Adam Sandler, he stopped by the

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University of South Carolina. He was at the Carolina Coliseum

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and he played basketball with the men's basketball team on

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Wednesday afternoon before doing a concert at the Colonial Life

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for Reas Saandler said, shout out to the game Cocks.

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I got to meet the coach a lot of the

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players that were nice enough not to swat off all

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my shots. See, this is so much more fun today.

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If you listen to Friday Show, Friday Show is a

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little serious. The news was a little serious. This is fun.

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This is what I want to do some SNL news.

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Another cast member has left. Who is it, Johnny Mack?

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It is Eggo Nuotam, who joined the show in twenty eighteen.

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She said, the hardest part of a great party is

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knowing when to say goodnight. This is on Instagram and

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she said, I am immensely grateful to Loren for the opportunity,

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to my castmates, the writers, and the crew for their

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brilliant support and friendship week after week on that stage

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taught me more than I could have ever imagined, and

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it will carry those memories on that laughter with me always.

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Now invite me to your weddings. Please. During the week,

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Jimmy Kimmel talked about retiring. I'll go first. You're not retiring.

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Why would you retire. It's a great gig. You have

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the summers off. As I've said in the past, just

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tell it. If you want to work less, just tell ABC.

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I want a longer winter break. I want to not

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do a show at all. On Fridays. You guys can

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show Friday Night videos or something. We'll tape two on Wednesday,

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we'll do four week You're not walking away from the show, Jimmy,

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It'd be insane. It's a good gig and you're like

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my age what are you going to do record a

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podcast in the basement. Kimmel's answer, I'm not prepared to

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answer that question. Something I think about a lot. Things

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have changed over the last few years, the last nine years.

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Every day is a new adventure and I kind of

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take them as they come. So much press about the

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Spinal Taps. Everything about the Spinal Tap two has been

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in character in universe. So The Guardian went with the

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bit and said almost all the Spinal Taps catalog has

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been unavailable since release. At one point, their then label, Megaphone,

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took legal action to prevent them from making any music

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at all. From nineteen sixty seven's Spinal Tap Sings to

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nineteen eighty two Smell the Glove, the band made eleven

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studio albums plus four rumored unreleased records, two live albums,

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as well as Nigel Toughnell's solo project Clam Caravan. Yet

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since nineteen eighty four, all that's been available has been

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the soundtrack to the film, featuring a selection of songs

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from those albums. Then the band put out nineteen ninety

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two s Break Like the Wind, a mixture of new

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tracks and re recordings, and then a similar compilation on

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two thousand and nine's Back from the Dead, the Guardian

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tells us the problem is that, for nearly fifty years,

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ownership of spinal TAP's catalog has been scattered. At one

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point it was owned by shadowy Iranian operatives before Ian

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Faith faked his own death and distributed the songs around

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assorted fated celebrities like Mario Andretti and Billy Jean King. Now,

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even if spinal Tap wanted to re release the catalog,

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they couldn't find it to buy it back. And that

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is a fun Saturday episode of Daily Comedy News. Tomorrow

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show will be good too. I got a lot in

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the script and I bounced like seven things today, so

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we got plenty to talk about. And I'll meet you

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back here tomorrow